Sidenote: this was spoken/written last night
So yea, today things flare up a little. I’m not sure how much of it is fibromyalgia related or from my recent lung issues or from a cold or a combination of all 3, but what I do know is that I was definitely not doing well haha
I was in bed for 12 hours, 12 hours! And even after that it still felt like a goddamn struggle to get up, and I’ve learnt from the past, if it’s that difficult to wake up, then I should listen to my body & get a helluva lot of rest before things get worse.
And as per usual, the regular thoughts of ‘letting people down’ and ‘not being able get things done’ and FOMO (for work & fun) come about.
But I alway have to force myself remember just how far I’ve come, and although it’s not ideal, and sure my route will be longer than others, that if I put in the work, sustainably, which means not rushing & being patient with myself & my hustle, that I’ll eventually attain what I want.
And the basic testimony to that is the journey I’ve taken over the last few years,
Since falling sick, My route has been a longer one (when compared to my peers, or even those just younger than me) but it’s still a path forward, I’ve failed, I’ve cried, I’ve wanted to give up, but I kept moving forward, and through all the failures, tears & darkness, there were wins, achievements, joy. Sure, sometimes they’re wins others would take for granted, but what matters is my relationship with those elements & what I do about them, and I will not go quietly into the night.
Just gotta keep moving forward.