Are you one of the Walking Dead?

Good Afternoon dear readers,

It’s been a while since I’ve written something, and during the short hiatus, aside from the weekend, I felt quite unproductive.. Lost at times, like i was sleep walking. I guess my writing helps me keep focused on where I wanna go, plus it gives me a sense of satisfaction, if that makes sense.

So today i’m back at Starbucks Monash, Café Mocha next to me and a Nazrin in front of me testing out the Bose QuietComfort 15. Feels good to be back here, in the very environment where I wrote more of my best pieces, there’s just something about this place, this is by far my favourite Starbucks. Yesterday the Fibromyalgia beat me, but today I’m back. It’s an on going fight, and I ain’t giving up anytime soon.

On to today’s topic, over the weekend my sister & I went down to Singapore and had a great time with Harveen, Komal & Gayatri. It was a well spent weekend, Universal Studios Singapore , Harry Potter exhibition, lots of beer, good food and bonding. The last time I went to Universal Studios Singapore I tried out the Transformers ride which was a bug step for someone who never goes on roller coasters and such, and this time around I took another step forward by going on The Mummy ride, it was scary but it was also a lot of fun, one of the highlights of the trip. So anyway, the last weekend has spurred me to try and do something new/adventurous/fun/memorable every weekend, essentially to out more living in my life, whether it’s a road trip, or a family day playing board games, or trying new food or watching the sunrise/sunset with loved ones.

Have you ever sat down and asked yourself, what the hell did I do last week? How did I spend the last month? What have I been doing with my life?

There have been to many times when I’ve felt like i was sleep walking through life, that I was in a coma, that I was one of the Walking Dead.

There are just too many times I’ve let the weekend slip away, i have quite a bit of free time and there are so many things I could be doing that I am not.

Life is meant to be lived and explored, it’s not meant to be a series of repeated actions day-in day-out.

Life is about creating moments that you will cherish, moments that will enrich you life.

Yes we all have obligations and responsibilities, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t live.

For those who work really hard over the week, take one day of the weekend to refuel and get to that much needed rest you so desire and spend the other day living life. This is an essential part of being productive and not having regrets as you lay on your death bed. There are so many things we can do, and if you say, well money is an issue, I never said anything about doing expensive things, living life doesn’t exclusively mean flying sound the world, it can be doing simple things with the people you love, enjoying your time on this planet, going to the beach, watching the sunset, enjoying a bottle of wine in the garden with family and friends, or even even spending some time on your own by going for a walk, hike, road trip by yourself. A lot of the time, the best ways to spend our time is right under our noses.

When’s the last time you got the family together and played charades or taboo? When’s the last time you tried out a new restaurant? When’s the last time you went on a road trip?

These are the times you should be saying You Only Live Once (YOLO) to encourage you to expand your life, not diminish it. I find that too many people abuse YOLO to do stupid things, but I guess that may just be my opinion.

You Only Live Once, So Put More Living in Your Life. Even the littlest of things can Put More Living in Your Day.

Straight From The Heart

Sunday Morning Reflections

Good Afternoon guys, got anything planned for today?

I got up at 5:30′ had my holy hour, had a few (actually more than a few) laughs watching Friends, took a 2 hour nap, did some errands, had lunch (which my sister cooked), cleaned up and now I’m here at Starbucks with my, you guess it right, my Café Mocha.

It’s been a good week, a week of picking up the pace, a week of recollecting my focus & a week of realisation, realising that I was going off track.

Restarting the practice of waking up early was not easy, it took a lot of will to beat the desire to just jump back under the covers, but when i did, I found a sense of satisfaction in my ability to do it. It made me feel a lot better, made me feel like my days were more productive. There’s just something about getting up early that makes me feel like I’ve started the day like a champion.

“leadership is shown by the human being who fights the urge to stay under the covers on cold day and throws on his/her running shoes to pound the pavement. Not because running miles on a forty morning is fun. But because it’s wise.” Robin Sharma

Over the next week I’m going to need to add more reading to my days, as well as injecting some exercise into my days.

Going back to the week that is just ending, there was fun involved but more importantly, there was the need to step up and start helping around the house. It’s not easy, not something I could just get used to instantly after having never to worry about this sort of thing to needing to do wash my own clothes and all that jazz, but you know what, i like it. It’s giving me a better sense of independence. I like being more in control of life, from the cleanliness of my room to the washing of my clothes to looking after the dogs. To just get this out of the way, yes I have lived a very comfortable life, chores were never part of my life, judge me if you will, All said and done, I think I’ve turn out pretty alright, so far.

So, on a whole, this week has not only been about taking back control and responsibility that I was letting slip out of my hand, but also taking on more. It’s giving me a bigger sense personal growth.

So on to the next week, getting back to class this week and also keeping my part time job. I’ve set a certain number of hours of work I’d like to reach each week and also a certain number of hours to review my uni work, so let’s see whether I achieve it this week. Alongside waking up early, exercising & reading daily. By achieving these goals over the next week, I’ll be on track to reliving the 6 great weeks I had at the beginning of my second coming and hopefully, take it to 8-10 weeks.

Straight From The Heart

Of Holy Hours & Bed Time Musings

Good Afternoon dear readers,

I’m chilling at Starbucks Jaya One, my Café Mocha wasn’t very good and the Baristas corrected that, they made me a fresh Café Mocha and now I’m enjoying it. As I write this, I’m not running at my normal levels, I’ve caught the bug that was distressing my mum and sister, felt it creeping up on me yesterday but no way was I going to miss The Dark Knight Rises. I took some panadol and went forth to enjoy 2 hours and 44 minutes of brilliance.

Last night before I went to bed, I pulled out my iPad and did some personal writing, what I’m calling Bed Time Musings, not exactly like the Holy Hour, but similar. I focus on the day itself and what I can do to make the following day better. That’s when I formulated my Hibernation Plan to fight the bug, I would sleep from 1-6am then wake up for my Holy Hour, then sleep again till noon then wake up to blog etc and then go back to sleep at about 3:30/4 and then wake up at about 7 have dinner and read for an hour, and go back to bed at 10pm. This was my plan to fight the bug, but also feel productive, that even as I was getting much needed rest, I was still being productive. (and so far the plan is on track). But anyway, after I formulated this plan during my BTMs I realised how important my Holy Hours (and now also BTM) were to me. They keep me on track, and since they became less regular, I’ve been less productive, fighting the Fibromyalgia less and sleepwalking through most of my days… Hence, my new priority is to make sure I wake up everyday at 6am, no matter what time in sleep, just for my Holy Hour, and if I need to go back to sleep after and to do my BTM every night, i already feel so much more productive after one day of this, even though I slept from 1am-6am & 7am-1130am. This morning during my Holy Hour I thought about so many things that I’ve been neglecting, so many things that I can improve on and so on, I’ve woken up again from my sleepwalk and am taking control again.

The post-it above speaks volumes. Clarity breeds success,and how to we achieve clarity? By being aware of what we want, and how do we become aware of what we want, what we need? By thinking. Too many of us are sleepwalking through our life’s, not thinking about the path we are taking, or how we can do better. We just go with the flow, just letting life act on us, instead to us acting on life. And why? Because we are unaware of the fact that we are wasting our potential, because we distract ourselves we trivial matters. It’s sort of like being stuck in The Matrix. It’s easier to just go with the flow, sometimes it painful to think about what we should be doing instead of just doing we want to do. Sometimes we just lack the discipline to keep a set time, daily to Think, (A Room of One’s Own). You don’t need to think about the complexities of life, just focus on you, focus on what you need to do to Keep Moving Forward, focus on getting Aware so that you can make the better Choices so that you can see better Results. Take control of your life. Act on life.

I’ve had a lot of fun over the last 2-3 weeks but it could have also had the fun and been productive if I didn’t neglect my thinking time, my Holy Hours. In order to ensure they I don’t go back to sleepwalking, I need to be consistent with my Thinking Times.

My new mission, get my body accustomed to waking up at 6am, make Holy Hours and Bed Time Musings a daily habit.

Straight From The Heart

Sunday Morning Reflections

The Third Place. The place between home and work. Surrounded by the buzz of humanity, alone yet not alone, with just the right music in the air. A nice working environment that doesn’t entirely make you feel that you’re at work. The meeting point of work and play. The casualness of home but the formality of work when needed. And of course, a nice hot beverage to keep the gears spinning.

Good Morning everyone! It’s a nice looking Sunday in PJ as I type this to you on my iPad at Starbucks, my Café Mocha just waiting. Feeling a little tired and brain a little foggy, so please pardon me of this piece isn’t up to par.

The week was quite a fun one, but it flew by, just one more week before classes start again. It was a mix of family, a little pinch of Game of Thrones strategy, a little alcohol on the side (ok maybe not a little), heart to hearts, childishness, roaming around & per hour wages.

Life is a journey, and of course along the way we grow… never do I become as aware of how much I have grown as when I am with my cousin. Whenever we are back together, we are kids again, for most of the time. Our relationship was full of idiocies, fun and other things like that, but over the past year it has matured. Our relationship has taken on a new level, one that is partially fuelled by flammable substances. We made a joke that we were now 8 year olds with access to alcohol, which does explain a part of the new dynamic, and the other part is one of mutual respect & growth. The dynamic is no longer exclusively owned by the minds of two children, but by two maturing minds trying to find a balance between childish behaviour and growing up.

In a way, I guess this exemplifies another more widespread dilemma, the fight between saving ones inner child in a world of continuous hurdles, pessimism and seriousness. Can one enjoy the little pleasures and fun as a child would as one grows up? Well, I will certainly try to. I’ve seen people who have done it, and I want to live like them. I don’t want to be a grumpy old man, or a person that is too serious. I want my journey to be fun (yes I know it won’t be all fun, I learnt that a while back), I want the fun times to be epic so that when I look back, I look at them instead of the all the hurdles. Yes I want to learn from all the falls, but I don’t want to look back at my life when I’m old and remember the hard times, sure the hard times are vital for growth but they aren’t the first things you want to rethink about when you reminisce. But maybe, that’s just me.

The week has been good, could have been more productive but overall I’m happy with it. Just want the coming week to be filled with earlier mornings, less fatigue, more swimming, better sleep, about 16 hours at Machines, laughter, fun & more awesome memories…. maybe a road trip?

Straight From The Heart

Sunday Morning Reflections

Good Morning readers, How are you feeling today? Sunday is day of such mixed feelings. You’re happy to have the day off yet, you know that tomorrow is the start of another work week. I guess all you can really do is enjoy this beautiful Sunday and worry about work tomorrow.

And this is partly why i have moved the Reflections blog from Saturday to Sunday, because Sunday it the the baton is passed from the week before to the week to come, it is the transition day into a new week, hence why I thought Sunday would be a better day to reflect, not just on the week before, not just on the week to come, but also to reflect in general, because I just don’t do enough of that.

So coming to you live from Starbucks Jaya One, (which was coincidently
launched on my birthday a few years back) I bring you the debut of Sunday Morning Reflections. Enjoy.

It’s quite ironic (not sure if I’m using the word correctly) that as I write this, I’m actually staring at my own reflection in the iPad. The one thing we all know is that life isn’t easy, it isn’t straight forward. There are plenty of ups and downs and your outlook on life really depends on how you want to look at it, it’s really quite up to you.
I spent a huge chunk of last week recovering from the festivities of my cousins wedding, as I mentioned in a previous post, it was tiring, dramatic, stressful, a helluva lot of fun and worth it. Even as I woke up the first few mornings of the week in pain, muscles aching and tired as hell, I never once regretted doing what I did at the wedding, which was dancing like a god damn mad man. Nothing in life is free, and I knew that all that fun and dancing would have its price. Yea sure,the wedding took 3/4 days away from me, but at the end of the day:

On that note, what I realised a while back, that it’s not about the number of friends you have but the quality of the friends you have. Now I’m not saying to stop making friends or close yourself of from the social world, but too make sure you know who your best friends are, because these will be the guys and girls who will have your back and love you for who you are despite our flaws. Go ahead and make friends, don’t stop making friends but don’t neglect your Team, your Crew. And along the journey of life your Team may grow, who knows. Over the past 2 weeks I’ve made some new friends and I want to get to know them better, but there were also friendship that were strained and unfortunately, some that we’re lost. But that is life, there are friends who come for a reason, others for a season and the most important ones for life.

Life is going to have plenty of moments that will test you, whether it revolves around your family, your friends, your health or your work, you must have the self-belief that you can fight it, cause if you don’t, the battle has been lot even before it has started. And whether you win or lose, moving on is essential.

Straight From The Heart

Wednesday “Should have been Saturday Morning” Reflections

Good Afternoon readers, how are you guys doing? I’m back here at my Third Place, Starbucks Monash. My favourite of them all. Meet the baristas that I haven’t seen in a long time. Used my new Monash parking 🙂 so all in all, goo stuff.

I’d like to apologise for the tardiness of this post,last week says quite… Hectic. So I’ll try my best to pretend that today is last Saturday.

I had a lot a fun last week, but of course there was the side dish of drama and stress all over the place, but we made it out in the end. I’m still recovering from all the dancing. Reflecting on last week I’ve realised that I never want to feel like I’m not appreciated, it’s not a good feeling at all. People need to stop thinking that family will always be there no matter what because this can be abused, it can come to a point that one only goes back to those people you’ve neglected only when you need them, and this is not a healthy relationship. At some point, the people being taken for granted need to stand up for themselves. Why try so hard on people who don’t appreciate you when there at plenty of others who do appreciate you being part of their lives? This is a point that has become increasingly important to me over the past 6 months. I will make the effort to sustain the relationship and grow it, but if there is not reciprocation of this over a while, I’m going to stop wasting my time and effort.

On that note, I’ve also realised that family isn’t defined by blood. Last week 2 of my best friends came for the wedding, the controlled their liquor and behaved well, yes they had fun but they didn’t go bat-shit crazy, and when I told them that I was ok to go ballistic and get drunk, one of them looked at me and said, “Roshan, we have been invited represent the Groom, we will not make him look bad. Most importantly, we are repressing your family, the Kanesan family.” I was so damn touched by this, there was enough alcohol over the four days to flood Penang, but they didn’t act like kids in a candy shop. Thank you guys. That line is still stuck in my head, “we are representing the Kanesan family.”

What else did I learn? Punjabis know how to have fun 🙂 . That Even though i’ve not had the best health in my life, i am so very blessed to have my family and my friends in my life, a bunch of crazy, fun-loving & caring people.

Love you guys,

Thank for tuning in,

Straight From The Heart

Saturday “Should Have Been Morning” Reflections

Good evening everyone,

How’s everyone doing? Today has been really good. I’m in PD right now with some great friends, it’s been great so far 🙂 the drive down was great, I had really fun time driving down. Had some great food at this place in Seremban. The pics should be on Twitter.

So as for reflections, this week has been better, Monday to Wednesday was awesome, Thursday not so awesome and Friday and today have been great. Been getting back to my “good routines”, expect for the swimming in the mornings. Life is looking good, I’ve learnt to let go of things that I can’t control, I’ll do my best and leave the rest to life. That’s all that I can do. All you can do in life is your best. This somehow reminds me of this line

The price of discipline is always better than the pain of regret.

Keep that in mind, it is a very powerful thought.

This week has been filled with the right steps going forward, yes it wasn’t perfect, but the good definitely outweighed the bad. One of my most precious friendships, that was in some trouble, has turned around and it is looking really good. My good friend graduated from Pre-U. I got back to work. Ivy is on the way (3 weeks).

Looking back, I’ve learnt more about friendship, it’s not always easy, and it takes two to tango. There are always two sides to a story. Respect the people around you the same you would want people to respect you. Don’t dish out what you can’t handle and there are things in life that matter and others that don’t. Make sure you know the difference. Please pardon my language but there are things in life that you just got to look and say, “Fuggitt”. You know who and what’s important to you, and that’s all that matters.

Straight From The Heart

Caring Too Much

Good Morning everyone! Today is feeling like a good day, feeling a little tired, but nothing that will trouble me much, woke up without pain and I woke up at 7am. Didn’t go for a swim, that’s the aim for tomorrow. 🙂 feeling pretty damn good this fine morning, looking forward to work at 10, am at Starbucks with my temporary companion Soy Café Mocha.

So I think I can say that I’ve made it out of the Storm, it was a trying two weeks but I made it, and I’m back on track to bring back on track. Haha. Thank you to everyone who supported me and helped me brace the storm and get out of it and I’m sorry to the people I hurt while bracing myself.

Onward to today’s piece.

I am a strong believer than the most important person in one’s life, is oneself. Why? Because if I can’t take care of myself, how can I take care of others? How I can i lead when I can’t even lead myself? How can I help others I care about if I can’t help myself?

I’m not saying don’t care about others, I’m saying that remember that you are equally, if not more, important than the people who love and care for. So make sure you do justice to your life before worrying about others. Now, please don’t take this as my blessing to go become a self obsessed, egomaniac whose entire world revolves around oneself. Just make sure you take are of yourself before you got out of your way to help others. That may work for a while, but in the long run it’s not sustainable and it’s not the way to live your life.

I’m the type of person who cares very much about my family and friends, I empathise withheld they go through, I try my best to really listen to them and I’m there for them to the best of my ability. I can confidently say that I’m a great friend 90% of the time, and if you can find someone from my inner circle who will say otherwise, I will retract that statement. I care very much for my family and friends, and most of them reciprocate, but there are some who I feel take me for granted and this would affect me and stress me, that is until yesterday when a very wise man said to me, “why are you being so stupid? Why let it affect you?”. And that’s when it hit me… I was being stupid, why was I putting so much effort into something what was mostly one way?

“I use to care, now I don’t.” – A Wise Friend

There’s only so much we can do, and once we’ve done our best, all we can do is watch.

“Let one live their life & learn from their mistakes. What we should worry about is making sure, we as a person, keeps on the right track.” – Another Wise Friend

Care for people as much as they care for you, care more if you want but as long as it isn’t counter-productive to you.There are plenty of people in my life who deserve my love and care, and for those who haven’t been doing their part, don’t expect me to call. I’ve had enough.

Straight From The Heart

Saturday Morning Refelctions

Good Morning everyone, I apologise for not being consistent this week, I got distracted and was waking up late and all that jazz. I’m sorry.

It’s the end of another week, and it’s been a good week for friendships but not so good a weeks for my productivity and wallet. I spent way too much money this week, and let my discipline slip. I’m going to e track on track and start waking upon early again. The last week was filled with birthday celebrations and friendships, and I have no regrets about that. I should have just managed my time more wisely. And I have already had my break, it’s time to get back business and run straight at the things I’ve been avoiding.

Sorting some uni stuff.
Waking up at 6am
Swimming.
Eating good.
Having that talk I’ve been thinking about.

I’m actually feeling quite messed up, just watched this movie called Project X and honestly, I didn’t like it, it was fun for a while but then… Anyway, the movie got me thinking about the things that are bothering me, hence the messed up feeling inside, I’m not upset or anything, I just feel messy. Was thinking about the things and people that have been frustrating me, and it is time to address those issues.

I haven’t slept yet, we spent the night celebrating the birthday of a very dear friend of mines. My sister cooked chicken curry, my mum made prathas, my brother baked the cake, another friend brought some good wine, another guy distracted the birthday boy and I bought the balloons, decorated and organised. #win. Hahaha.

So anyway, I’m feeling good now, birds chirping, the sun’s rising, I’m blogging. I can feel the mess becoming less messy. Feeling lighter. Feeling less cluttered. Feeling hopeful and positive that tomorrow will be the start of an awesome week and tang today will be the day I readjust myself. Looking forward to having a Café Mocha at Starbucks. And maybe go for a swim in the evening. Going to finish my current book by Monday night.

Anyway, good night and Good Morning folks, I’m gonna head to bed,everyone one else has either left or is already sleeping. I’m really happy that I decided to get this done before sleeping. I’ll add some more photos later.

Hope you enjoyed my reflection for the week.

Straight From The Heart

Sunday “Should Have Been Saturday Morning” Reflections

Good evening guys, I apologise for the tardiness of last weeks reflection.

Looking back at the previous week, reflecting, It could have been better. It wasn’t a very good week. The fibromyalgia was kicking my ass and there were times I felt like I was going insane. Times i thought that i was going to end up the same before. Reminds me of the article I wrote, iClouded.

I’m upset that I didn’t blog as much. I’m disappointed that i didn’t wake up early everyday, followed by a swim. I’m let myself down by not going to work. And most of all, I’m heartbroken for the way I reacted on Thursday with regards to my sister and brother, especially my sister. I am so sorry for the way I acted towards her, she didn’t know what I was going through.

“It’s not what happens to you in life, it’s what you do about it.” W. Mitchell

“whether I fail or succeed that’ll be no man doing but my own. I am the Force.i can clear any obstacle before me or I can get lost in the maze. My choice. My responsibility; win or lose only I hold the key to my destiny.” Elaine Maxwell

It may not have been much of a productive week, as the weeks before, but on the plus side, I did get some good rest and realised that it took 6 weeks for the Storm to kick-in instead of 2. And I have been feeling better over the past 2 days. Should be back in action tomorrow. I did get some reading done. Also, I did have some great fun. Attended the Starbucks Summer Party which was awesome, went to the BSKL British Summer Fair with my friends yesterday and it turned out to be a pretty fun afternoon/evening.

I guess I just needed a break, there was a point I guess when I should have eased off the ‘gas’ a little, maybe I could’ve extended my run to 7/8 weeks, but that’s the next goal. I had a misstep last week, a little stumble, a speed bump, now it’s time to learn from it, pick up whatever I can no Keep Moving Forward. So I guess I’m happy about the previous week, reminded me of humanity, that life, progress and success isn’t a straight full-throttle shot to the top, it’s like climbing up mountains, step at a time, trying not to make mistakes but leanings from them when they do occur. And following on from this, this is why we need to reflect, to ensure that all the hard work we do and sacrifices we make are worth it, that after toiling and climbing, shedding blood, sweat and tears, that we make sure that we are in line with our goals and that we are climbing the right mountain.

“you can’t get to the top of Everest by jumping up the mountain. You get to the mountaintop by taking incremental steps. Steep by step you get to your goal.” Robin Sharma

That’s why we should reflect, because we all want our work and effort to not be in vain. We want to reach our goals and not take a wrong turn along the way, or if we do take a wrong turn to correct out path and get back on track. That’s why we reflect. That’s why we set up a A Room of One’s Own, that why we set aside to think. To not only brainstorm and come up with amazing ideas, but to make sure that after all the bullshit and detours, that we reach the summit of the certain mountain, that you enjoy the moment and not be in disappointment and regret.

There is nothing so useless as doing efficiently that which should not be done at all. ~Peter F. Drucker

Straight From The Heart

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